Evolution Of That Hairy Icon Guy

In the beginning, God created Che Guevara. And Che was without form and void; and darkness was upon his douchbag face. That was in 1928 — the beginning is more recent than you probably thought.

And God said, Damn, that ain’t right! And he snuffed out douchebag Che in 1967 and took a Mulligan, creating Cornelius from the rib of Che in 1968.

cccc

Che Guevara (left) and Cornelius (right)

And God said, Yeah man — that’s what I’m talking about! And he saw that Cornelius was all lit up and it was good. But a talking chimpanzee only goes so far as an icon of man.

In time, God became bored with Cornelius, because let’s face it … as talking chimpanzees go, Cornelius was a bit of a pussy. And so God said, Let there be a firmament, and let it divide the earth below from the intertubes above. And let there be a Maddoxx to rule the intertubes. And so God created Maddoxx and he saw that it was good.

Best Page in the Universe

Banner I stole from Maddox’s site. He’ll probably be pissed. (http://maddox.xmission.com/)

God was all pleased with himself, and for many years he was content. But then God said, That Maddox guy is only posting like once a month. What’s up with that? God kept clicking the refresh button on his browser, hoping that Maddox would make more posts. Finally, God said, Aw fuck it! And God created Russell Brand and commanded Russell to put videos on the intertubes.

russell_brand

Screen Grab from Russell Brand’s Youtube Channel. He’ll probably be pissed too. (https://www.youtube.com/user/russellbrand)

And Russell Brand created his Youtube channel and began posting videos. And he went a little crazy with it and started producing a LOT of videos — like every other day. And Brand branded his channel The Trews. And God said, Chill the fuck out, Homie! You’re making videos faster than I can watch them! But then God popped back over to Maddox’s Youtube channel and sighed, for it had been several weeks since Maddox last produced a video.

And God returned to Russell Brand’s Youtube Channel and saw that there was a new video there, and it was good. And God watched another Brand video, and it was good too. So God grabbed a bag of chips and sat back and watched The Trews.

This entry was posted in Humor & Rants and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Evolution Of That Hairy Icon Guy

  1. Michael Corelone says:

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