Tag Archives: Humor

CNN Breaking News: We’re OUT!

CNN announced today that they are leaving the business of reporting the news so that they can devote their full attention to their core business of advertising for the Lockheed Martin company. Said Wolf Blitzer: “That whole news shtick was just a … Continue reading

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Sputnik The Alien Spambot

Roger Sikes was slowly emerging from the fog of a late afternoon nap when he thought he heard a whistling sound. It sounded a lot like a falling bomb. All at once, the windows along the front of Roger’s house … Continue reading

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Lenny the Lifehacker

I walked into my pal Lenny’s kitchen the other day and found him doing something that looked kind of weird. He had a pot of water boiling on the stove and was holding a spoon in the water. Then, as I … Continue reading

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Evolution Of That Hairy Icon Guy

In the beginning, God created Che Guevara. And Che was without form and void; and darkness was upon his douchbag face. That was in 1928 — the beginning is more recent than you probably thought. And God said, Damn, that ain’t right! … Continue reading

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Block Bullshit

It would be so much easier if Facebook has a simple “Block Bullshit” option …

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We Don’t Buy Ghetto Metal

A shorter, more recent version of this story exists. See: Sal’s Pawn & Metal Emporium Mike frowned at the “Closed” sign in the window of Dick’s Pawn Shop and looked down at the American Eagle — an ounce of platinum — … Continue reading

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Time Travel & The Grassy Knoll

If it were possible to travel backwards in time, this is what Dealey Plaza and the Grassy Knoll would have looked like on November 22, 1963: Actually, it would probably have been a lot more crowded than that picture. Those people would … Continue reading

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When Good Robots Go Bad

“Are you going to shoot me, Max?” Wallace stood by the desk in his basement workshop, his hands raised, and watched Max very carefully. In Max’s hand was Wallace’s 9mm Browning Hi-Power, and it was clearly aimed at Wallace’s forehead. Wallace … Continue reading

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12 Reasons Why The Internet Caters to Drooling, Imbecilic Shit-Clickers

The following is a list of titles of twelve click-bait articles that I copied and pasted from the usual internet rags, most notably Huffington Post. I didn’t have to work for this: It took about ten minutes of scanning front … Continue reading

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TRUSTUS PHARMACEUTICALS!!! Oh Yes!

Good News! — Good News! — Good News! As I reported previously, Xtranormal, the maker of the animation software I use for the Trustus Pharmaceuticals family of videos, went out of business. The software became nonfunctional once Xtranormal closed their … Continue reading

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Nikola Tesla Was An Idiot

Well … no, not really. He wasn’t a complete idiot, but he also wasn’t the super genius that he’s often made out to be either. There are a few things at play in the whole Nikola Tesla love movement, which has … Continue reading

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Fifty Shades of Grey Alien

On the origins of a modern myth … I stumbled across this rather non-spectacular picture of a “Grey alien” the other day and I kept thinking: What does this remind me of? It looks so familiar, all naked and creepy-like. This … Continue reading

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Tommy Lee Jones Will Be Horrified!

Look at them! Holy crap! I haven’t seen a matching set like that since Jesse Ventura and Riff Raff!

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Nostalgic for Trustus Pharma

I’ve been itching for awhile to get back into making Trustus Pharmaceutical videos. However, the company that produced the animation software that I used is kaput. Xtranormal is no more. They are bereft of life. They have ceased to be. … Continue reading

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The University of None of Your Fucking Business

I popped onto Facebook a little while ago and as usual I was bombarded with questions to update my profile. Where did you go to school? Where did you go to school? Where did you go to school? Fucking Hell. … Continue reading

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Smart Dicks Choose Tungsten!

I’m way late to the party here, since the US Postal Service’s “If it fits, it ships” slogan has been around for a good four years now. The humor potential is also seriously dampened by sneaky weight limits that are … Continue reading

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Museum of Crap Angry Over Shit Opinion

Talk about unfortunate translations! I think the museum of art’s director called the culture minister “a piece of crap.” As translated, it appears that the museum of crap’s director called the culture minister “a piece of art.” It’s harder to … Continue reading

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Gloriously Titled Books that Cry Out to be Proudly Displayed on One’s Bookshelf

The rise of e-books sadly means there will be fewer and fewer books displayed on people’s shelves as the years roll on. That’s a pity, I think. In addition to their sheer convenience, the books on the shelves of one’s … Continue reading

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There is NO Debate!

“Are Militant Atheists Using Chemtrails to Poison the Angels in Heaven?” Writer Bob Cesca found a rare example where the phrase “There is NO Debate!” is actually true, and then proceeded to get punked. I generally dislike the phrase “There is no … Continue reading

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Edward Snowden is a Dick

The title of this post isn’t a judgement of Edward Snowden’s actions as an NSA traitor. That’s a completely separate issue. I’m actually kind of on the fence with regard to that. On the one hand, I think it’s a … Continue reading

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